Green Gambling

What is going on with my husband....?

My husband is a compulsive gambler, as far as I know he is not gambling now. He did attend Gamblers Anonymous for 3 years but now does not go as he does not want the constant reminder and feels like he is being treated like a child at the meetings. He says his debt is reminder enough. 3 months ago he decided he was no longer sure if he wanted to continue being married to me or if he wanted to 'set me free' and not have to be answerable to me. We are currently in the process of legally having the finances sorted out to enable us to go our seperate ways. He says he may well live to regret his decision to finish our marriage, although he does not want a divorce yet but at the moment cannot put the effort into our marriage to make it work. He wants us to remain friends, says he loves me but not sure if he is 'in love' with me. Says the problem is with him not me, he does not feel able to put the work into saving our marriage. Have you any idea what he's thinking, please help. We have been married almost 8 years and have been quite happy before this, never any major problems. I love him and would like to make our marriage work but he will not discuss the problems in our marriage and says he just does not know if he wants me or not. I am going away for a week soon for some space to think. Will this make him see what life will be like without me?

Public Comments

1. you are too controlling for him
2. Why do you want to be with someone you have to convince to love you? Let him and his gambling debts go and try to find someone who doesn't mind putting forth a little effort. No marriage will work unless both partners are willing to work on it. Sounds like hubby doesn't want to have to answer to anyone else, in which case, he shouldn't be married.
3. Have you considered he may have met someone else? If you had left out the gambling bit...those phrases are a little familiar to that scenario. Honest, only putting an idea out for you.
4. He's a self centered lout that apparently has no interest in saving your marriage...why worry about what he's thinking? He's already told you. If you have any interest in making your life better, get rid of the dead weight that he is!